Today is a big day. At 8:30 this evening I will host an open mic poetry reading in memory of my friend Jennifer Diskin. She died in December. She fought cancer for something like 15 years.

I will stand up and welcome people and keep all the readers moving along and organized. My friends will be there for me. Except for my friend Jen.

What did I learn from Jen? Besides how to write poetry and read it in public? Besides how to pursue what you want no matter what the odds?  Besides how to be yourself no matter who wanted to push or pound or shove you into their box?

I learned how to say, "If I were Jen what would I want?" If I were in a wheel chair and it was hard to get out would I want somebody to come and take me to the writers group? If I were in a nursing home and only 35 would I want to go out? If I were in the hospital not getting better would I want a visit?

I learned from Jen. I'm not tooting my own horn, as my mother used to say, or trying to make anybody feel bad for or with me. I'm just saying that now I know what the golden rule was really about.

Will I be able to visit someone else in the hospital? I sure hope so. Will I be able to stand up and honor Jen tonight? Sure. I'll just say, "What would Jen want me to do?" And maybe I'll be able to imagine what that will be.